i've known for a while that one thing i appear to be lacking in my life is a sense of self
i may talk about this one day i've never talked about it im just posting this here as a reminder to talk about this one day anyone reading this, u may not understand what i mean right now but whenever i get a chance to come back and flesh it out, you will get exactly what i'm saying
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i was thinking about my entries on this site and i got an idea for an entry
the idea was this: share something u wouldn't normally share ok so that is what i plan to do here i never told anyone this a few years back there was a girl i met at church who was married i never saw her husband because apparently he wasn't coming to church some months passed and her husband ended up passing away some months passed after that and she and i started talking i wanted to be her friend because i wanted to have someone to talk about church stuff with she seemed to show interest in me, apparently she had a dream we were supposed to be together anyway so we started talking.. i want to stress that i genuinely only wanted to be friends with her.. eventually i learned about her whole dream thing but that didn't come until later so we were talking and i enjoyed spending time with her and talking to her, she was really cool we did a few different things.. i remember she came to my place, i went to her place, we went to o'charleys, we went to moe's, went to opry mills, just a bunch of different things this whole time i was just happy to have a friend.. i wasn't really feeling her like a g/f.. i just wasn't into her like that at all so what ended up happening is we kept hitting this brick wall where it was like she wants a relationship but i want a friendship we hit this wall a few times it was frustrating i think for both of us because for me it was like.. "u say ur cool being my friend but you're really not" and she was thinking "where is this relationship going?" like if i didn't want to be with her then she just wanted to stop talking to me altogether during one of the times she and i weren't talking, i ended up eventually getting in that toxic relationship i had that yall may have heard about lol so as time passed i ended up talking to her again, but i was still in this toxic relationship what happened was, i could not stand my girlfriend, and everytime i talked to this girl from church it was like i was being renewed again typing that is weird because its like so apparent that i should have dropped my skank girlfriend and got with the girl from church.. but at the time i was just stuck on stupid looking back i don't even know why i was trying to love my ex so much.. like.. i think i just didn't realize that i didn't like her.. i kept thinking "she's not that bad" also i was so caught up in trying to make her happy that i never thought about how i felt.. if i ever just sat and thought about how i felt then i would've dropped her way sooner than i did anyway.. so what ended up happening was i kinda found myself between the two of them.. my g/f knew about the girl from church but didn't feel threatened because she knew i wasn't really feeling her like that the girl from church knew about my girlfriend but she just sat back and watched the show really.. she knew i was in a messed up relationship but what was she going to do? she was there for me when i needed her and she was a listening ear ok so moving forward.. i ended up having a dream about both of them.. i told the pastor the dream and he said it meant i wasn't supposed to be talking to both of them at the same time i was basically entertaining a counterfeit and i needed to stop i was being a moron at the time and i didn't take heed.. i didn't want to lose my g/f looking back it seems like dropping my g/f and taking this girl from church would've been a great idea.. but for whatever reason i wasn't ready to do that so eventually the girl from church just stopped talking to me i text her something.. i remember i was asking her about something i saw on the internet called "financial infidelity" which was something that apparently happens in marriage.. i was asking her about it because like i said earlier she was previously married she didn't respond back to me for like 3 days when she finally text me she said she was done talking to me altogether i was ok with it, i was kinda hurt by it but i was ok with it.. i remember when i got that text i was trying to think of what to say but then i finally decided to say nothing ok so from there everytime i saw her she never really would engage with me i know she didn't want to talk to me but i figured we could still talk at church and stuff.. i mean.. i understood we weren't going to be friends away from church anymore but i at least thought we could be cordial and talk here and there but she didn't seem up for it a few different times she kinda blew me off.. finally one day i was done with her completely because i was trying to talk to her and she was giving me one word answers and she wouldn't look at me this was the moment i completely gave up on her and i don't think i ever initiated another conversation with her after that fast forward maybe like a year after that moment i woke up one day and no cap i actually found myself wanting that girl from church it was the weirdest thing i was in my apartment walking to the bathroom or something and a desire for her hit me all at once.. like as more than friends.. it was very weird.. whatever was keeping me from liking her vanished i just sort of tried to soak it in from then to now i haven't had any interactions with her if i had an opportunity to talk to her i would.. i feel like i would enjoy being with her in a relationship.. whatever was keeping me from being interested in her is gone i feel like we could start new if the opportunity came but im not actually seeking that out or anything i want her to be happy and i'm not getting in the way of that i don't really have anything else to say about it if i had the opportunity to start new with her i would, but i don't really have that opportunity and i'm not going to try to force it so there's something i would typically never share peeps holla back sidenote: if anyone wants i can post a picture of the girl from church.. just holla at me, leave a comment or something.. otherwise i won't post this video echoes a lot of things i've said about modern women
they are terrible, they're angry, they have no conversation, they aren't loving, they can't give u any peace, all they do is nag and complain, but they want u to be mr. perfect and here's the crazy part.. even if u are mr. perfect, she still disses you- because you're not HER SPECIFIC IDEA of what perfect is and here's another thing i've noticed modern women want u to be this great man.. over 6ft, 6 figures, 6-pack abs, moral, having integrity, great career, status in society, nice car, etc but let one of these exact same women be bi or turn lesbian.. MAGICALLY THERE ARE NO MORE REQUIREMENTS her girlfriend magically doesn't need to be tall, doesn't need 6 figures, doesn't need to be in shape, doesn't need to have status.. the man a woman dates has to be excellence personified, the woman she dates is just a dusty dyke who works in a factory or call center and remember all that "a man better be packin downstairs" talk? guess what? women don't have anything downstairs! ..but when women turn lesbian or live bisexual, they don't diss women for having nothing.. but they have no problem dissing the man for having something she considers small the truth is, just like you shouldn't diss a woman for having a vagina instead of a penis, you shouldn't diss your man for having a 6 inch penis as opposed to an 8 inch one.. because guess what? NO ONE CREATED THEIR OWN BODY, YOU STUPID WHORE women only hold men in the dating pool to these crazy standards.. women don't hold women to these crazy standards, they don't hold their kids to these crazy standards of excellence either- we know that cuz their kids are in special ed.. they also don't hold people older than them to these crazy standards.. if a man in his 60s doesn't have a degree, the woman still shows him respect.. smiles when she sees him, calls him mr. roberts or whatever his name is if you're in your 30s without a degree what is this woman saying to you? "i don't know if we can talk cuz u might not be able to keep up" .. "i need a man who is educated" .. "you're not on my level" etc they only hold men in their dating pool to these crazy standards that they can't even meet im glad this woman finally woke up to see how nonsensical modern women are.. they are delusional and hard to deal with.. they're nearly impossible to please and nearly impossible to love and wonder why they're single feminism doesn't tell women that "sexual freedom" just means men can bang your mouth and send you home and never call you
it doesn't tell women "independence" just means u will have to work as hard as a man it doesn't tell women they will never have a relationship because decent guys get tired of arguing with u over who wears the pants.. so u will end up having to trap a guy who has u in a rotation good luck making a loving family out of that i've been talking on here recently about how modern women talk to u crazy and how i'm tired of it well someone dropped a video today along those lines so i decided to post it to kinda help fill out that whole theme dude i am SO tired of modern women why do they think they can talk to u any type of way? if a woman is in counseling or therapy for a prolonged period of time, she is not relationship material
as a general rule i would say the cutoff point (and i feel like i'm being fairly generous) is about 2 years i did counseling myself so i'm not against it.. it helped me to unravel some things from my past that were affecting me in the present i was in counseling for less than 2 months.. i think people can be in it longer depending on the level of trauma they have.. but once people get past (in my opinion) around 2 years.. its generally no longer a means to an end, but a way of life when you meet these women who have been in therapy for like 5 or 6 years, those women are certified nuts.. they are also incredibly self absorbed.. they want to keep talking about themselves and they don't want any judgment.. so a lot of times they are also very stubborn when i say stubborn what i mean is, they don't want to hear anyone telling them the truth, they just want to do things their own way.. they want to be able to do something ridiculous without hearing the truth about it.. because the therapist isn't going to say "you're acting like an idiot" so my point is- women who have been in therapy for these prolonged periods of time 5, 6, 7, 8 years and beyond are not relationship material one thing you have to understand is this.. they are telling their therapist everything they aren't telling you so your relationship is basically doomed from the start.. they don't come to you with issues and problems, they go to their therapist.. how do u achieve emotional intimacy with someone who is dealing with all of their relationship issues outside the actual relationship? these women are worthless, they are hollow beings.. you can get with them and try to love them but they are essentially on a different planet.. they do not have their feet planted in your relationship.. their confidant is on their payroll again i'm pro therapy but watch out for these women who make it their way of life, they are legit crazy, self centered, and unable to grow i cannot stand these women.. i've actually had women tell me "i'm not telling you, i'm telling my therapist" ok well just date your therapist, skank i just want to point this out.. if a woman tells you she has been in counseling a long time it is a serious red flag that you are dealing with someone who refuses to grow that person is stuck in an arrested development, they're adult children.. they have no accountability and your relationship with them will be horrible just wanted to share this red flag for everyone to avoid i just want to point out that i was accurate once again i won't give the link i'll just repost the whole thing.. then below i'll show u why i'm reposting on 9/9/21 i did an entry called "erosion of virtue" here's what i said: +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ i wanted to post this little excerpt from the forum i go to i posted the image from the previous entry and it started a dialogue about women and their body count this guy came along and said women will lie about whatever you ask (which i agree with) but anyway here's what was said: him: some will just tell you, and even in that I find the numbers to be a lie. the concern should be how many people she had sex with in your damn circle. That number better be zero me: this comment^ in my opinion is a great example of how our standards as men continually erode 1. be a virgin 2. have less than 10 bodies 3. have as many bodies as you want but just none of my friends/family members next it'll be "have sex with anyone including my friends and family as long as u stop when we get together" then it'll be "as long as u just let me smash i don't care if you're unfaithful" and what's bad is men are actually taking pride in their lack of standards "i'm a real man, real men don't ask their girl if they had threesomes" like at some point we need to look up and realize how much ground we've lost and/or given away +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ok i'm back.. now here's why i just reposted that its because today look what i came across this is EXACTLY what i was talking about this is what we as men have allowed from women.. we have allowed them to erode us into a mere shell of ourselves our love for them has brought us low and we need to regain our standards we must get back to "no hymen no diamond" or at the very least a woman must not be a fornicator i have been on this for a while.. my ex was a fornicator and it was a horrible experience being with her today i don't date fornicators at all.. if you fornicate we won't be together u either A. have a hymen or B. you quit fornication and your vagina is collecting dust until you're married those are the ONLY two states a woman should be accepted in if you ask her if she's waiting for marriage and she says no then walk away this is my opinion, some of u may disagree but i'm done with these whores out here.. u have to understand if a woman will fornicate then she will also lie if she will lie then she will lie to you in other words, u might as well not date her because you won't be able to trust her she is going to have other dudes she can call at any moment, she is going to be missing the way a certain guy "put it down," when she's not with you she's with someone else, etc in my opinion its just no worth it.. you can't trust her, she can't trust herself.. also these women abort children.. if u think a woman who kills her own child cares about you- you got another thing comin again.. in my opinion a woman needs to A. have a hymen or B. genuinely be done with fornication if she's not done with that life- do not try to make her your girlfriend or wife if you're one of those guys who just smashes women then this probably isn't for you.. if you just want to smash women then you don't care about anything i'm talking about i'm talking about men who want real relationships to all you men who want real relationships.. avoid these modern whores there was a video on youtube about how women are getting degrees at a higher rate than men
men are apparently not showing up to college like they used to and the numbers are decreasing i left a comment and of course youtube deleted it, just like always they delete probably 70% of my comments so anyway, i caught it when they deleted it because i went to edit it and couldn't edit it so i copied it and i'll just share it here instead: i went to college, it was a horrible experience but through determination i made it through with a masters degree.. i don't blame men for leaving college, school in general is a waste of time in my opinion.. u can just go out and work and get the experience without wasting time and money in a school.. and even if you can't get a job- you can always be an intern, which is still better than college.. the american dream in general is something i've found to be a joke.. the more you wake up to the truth about society the less you want that carrot on a stick american dream.. the thing i didn't hear in this article is the effect the red pill and black pill have on young men.. men are seeing through the nonsense at an early age through the online commentary and they're avoiding the pitfalls previous generations went through.. i'll give an example, one day i left a comment about my experiences with women on a video and someone commented under me and i came to find out the person who commented under me was 12 years old.. i was shocked but these young guys are online learning at a fast rate, they are seeing through all the garbage society tries to force them into.. a lot of these kids don't have fathers so of course they're looking for father figures online and that is accelerating their knowledge.. the knowledge in the manosphere about money, career, and relationships is steering men away from the school debt trap, the 40 years of servitude, and the sacrificial attitude toward women that women actually punish i used to watch the show cheaters a lot
one thing i used to notice was it seemed like most of the time, the person who was in the wrong would be the person to win the fight, or the argument, or the person who was cheating would leave with that person i thought about it and i realized why its in the bible: psalms chapter 3 verse 3 For I was envious at the foolish, when I saw the prosperity of the wicked. 4For there are no bands in their death: but their strength is firm. 5They are not in trouble as other men; neither are they plagued like other men. 6Therefore pride compasseth them about as a chain; violence covereth them as a garment. 7Their eyes stand out with fatness: they have more than heart could wish. 8They are corrupt, and speak wickedly concerning oppression: they speak loftily. 9They set their mouth against the heavens, and their tongue walketh through the earth. 10Therefore his people return hither: and waters of a full cup are wrung out to them. 11And they say, How doth God know? and is there knowledge in the most High? 12Behold, these are the ungodly, who prosper in the world; they increase in riches. 13Verily I have cleansed my heart in vain, and washed my hands in innocency. 14For all the day long have I been plagued, and chastened every morning. 15If I say, I will speak thus; behold, I should offend against the generation of thy children. 16When I thought to know this, it was too painful for me; 17Until I went into the sanctuary of God; then understood I their end. 18Surely thou didst set them in slippery places: thou castedst them down into destruction. 19How are they brought into desolation, as in a moment! they are utterly consumed with terrors. 20As a dream when one awaketh; so, O Lord, when thou awakest, thou shalt despise their image. 21Thus my heart was grieved, and I was pricked in my reins. 22So foolish was I, and ignorant: I was as a beast before thee. in other words.. they win on earth but their end is bitter just let them "win" when u see someone take advantage of others and win.. u have to realize they aren't really winning.. it may look like it now but that is a shortsighted viewpoint |
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