i think its ridiculous when people complain about protests and blm and kneeling and things
not because i participate in them, but simply because- what group of people would watch unarmed people in their group be killed and not eventually speak up? people who complain about the speaking up are hypocritical because ANY group of people would eventually protest or riot or something after watching people in their group be killed the way some african americans have been thats just a fact
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on this i want to explain my thoughts on lovelyti and tasha k from youtube
ok i started out liking lovelyti and disliking tasha k now i dislike lovelyti and like tasha k let me explain how i used to feel first the reason i used to like lovelyti was because i felt like she had good perspectives and she seemed cool and she looked good the reason i disliked tasha k was because she seemed unruly.. like a loudmouth with no class, and i couldn't stand her enough to pay attention to a video now let me explain what happened to change my opinions on them and make me dislike lovelyti and like tasha k it seemed to me like lovelyti just started complaining too much.. she kept complaining about how people were calling her names and stuff.. it really got irritating.. she has a way of only allowing words and comments and sentiments that she likes.. but she will block you if you say something she doesn't like.. i know this because she blocked me.. i don't know what i said but she blocked me on her page another reason i am familiar with her blocking is because i remember seeing a comment some girl left who was actually very hurt that ti blocked her.. i remember she was saying she was a genuine fan but ti blocked her for giving her opinion and she sounded hurt by it, because she was a real fan of ti so i just got more and more tired of ti over time.. all her complaining, saying people think she's wrong, or people make fun of how she looks, or people call her names, etc.. i get that those things aren't fun but no one wants to click a video and hear u complain about your audience for 5 or 10 minutes your audience allows u to quit your 9 to 5, live in a nice house, drive a nice car, and dress nice so shutup i just got tired of ti complaining all the time, and i don't like that she blocked me, and i don't like how it seems like she only is nice to people who agree with her its irritating im not saying any of this in malice, btw.. i don't want harm to come her way- i'm just saying over time these things got old i also don't like how her format for videos changed, now she does these 2 hour long videos.. i like the short videos where i can just get straight to the news anyway.. the reason i started to like tasha k is because at first i thought she was just a crazy loudmouth who would never find a man.. but when i learned she was married it made me understand she actually may not be what i initially thought she was she actually kinda impressed me a bit one day because i watched a video and she was saying something like "my husband would never let me do that" or something.. and i realized she actually may not be what she seems, she actually seems to have some decency i generally think a loudmouth woman has no decency but she seems to have some- which made me think maybe she is playing up her personality for the camera, which is understandable i just in general have more respect for a married woman with kids than for a woman who is single who just bangs different guys so tasha k surprised me because she seems to actually prioritize her marriage once i started to see her say things that seemed to prioritize her husband and her marriage, i gained a certain respect for her and i was able to sit through some of her videos as a matter of fact, i think that's how i got into her- because i was thinking "no one would ever marry this chick" so i googled something like "tasha k husband" and i found a video she did with her husband.. so when i watched it, my perception of her changed in the midst of that, i also realized she says some really funny things then after that, i realized she doesn't complain about her audience like ti tasha seems to appreciate her audience which is something i respect just because your audience doesn't agree doesn't mean they hate you and it doesn't mean you have to block them so anyway.. once i started hearing her jokes i realized wow this woman is actually legit funny also she has a lot of good topics.. recently i really loved her expose on jaguar wright.. that was great and necessary.. because jag was dissing everyone so it was about time someone called her to task so there u have it.. my opinions on them totally switched if u would have told me 3 or 4 yrs ago that i would like tasha k and dislike lovelyti i would have laughed you off the planet but it happened i feel bad for dissing tasha k before.. i don't remember what i said but i am pretty sure i dissed her at some point in the comments anyway.. just wanted to share this, peaCe in the recent post i did called "move on" i said there were some things i never told anyone about that horrendous "relationship" i had
i will explain two things i never told anyone ok here is one i remember i wanted to see her one day and she was hesitant to come over so i offered to give her gas money if she came over she eventually said she would come over but she was like "but u better give me gas money" and yeah i had already offered it but that's how wack she was.. she only agreed to come over if i did that and she basically was like demanding it which made it way worse like i didn't mind offering it.. but when she said "you better give me gas money" it was like it took on a different feel she ended up coming over and i gave her whatever i had in my wallet which i think was $16 and she still just treated me like crap.. no matter what i did she treated me like dirt it left me feeling like i was paying her for her attention and she would bring whole loads of laundry to my apartment to wash.. even if she didn't ask, she would bring whole loads and then ask me to get them out of her car for her.. because she didn't have a washing machine so it was like, i'm letting her wash all her clothes, i'm giving her gas money, and when we would go out i would pay for her food so all in all that was the first thing i wanted to share.. she just made me feel horrible like she wouldn't be around if i didn't give her everything.. like she never made me feel like she really wanted to be with me so that was the first thing.. and that was mad embarassing for me to admit just now but let me tell something else i never told anyone ok so for this one i have to give some background to make it make sense ok so one thing i learned the hard way was my girlfriend was a narcissist another thing i learned the hard way was that narcissists will not be emotionally intimate with you when you are in a relationship with someone who will not be emotionally intimate with you- it affects you i remember distinctly getting to a place where i was just clamoring for something to "relate" to or feel "close" to in some way.. i specifically remember i had a strong desire to go find a season of curb your enthusiasm on dvd because at the time i needed something that i felt connected to it may sound weird but this is true.. i had a mission to go find a season of that show and i'm not sure if i knew it at the time but i know now it was because i had no connection with my girlfriend so i was like "i will be able to watch this show and connect with the characters and the sense of humor" because in a relationship with a narc they will not meet eye to eye with you on anything.. even simple things like asking your spouse to try some food on your plate, or try a drink or something.. they won't do it.. they will just say no and so you don't get to have the connection and the conversation that would come from someone who does things with you or agrees to see and experience what you see and experience ANYWAY so i was dealing with this and i eventually started talking to an old friend on the phone it felt really good to talk to her and so now i'm getting to what i wanted to share i was feeling all of those feelings of "my girl is not meeting any of my emotional desires" .. and i was just feeling low about it and one thing my girl never did was, she was never grateful for anything.. i had to beg her to say thank you for things and it just became a huge ordeal to where i finally told her to never say thank you to me because i got tired of her saying "i know you want me to say thank you, so thank you" like she made it a chore so anyway, i was in this weak space, and this girl i was talking to on the phone was treating me really well, just being attentive, listening, sharing, and being grateful- while my actual girl wasn't doing any of those things while i had to beg my girl for a thank you this other girl from the phone actually told me she was grateful because i had made her a song mind you this song at that point was TWELVE YEARS OLD but this girl was STILL telling me the song uplifted her and meant a lot to her, she really told me it meant a lot to her and it felt so good to hear at that time that i didn't know what to do with myself so anyway in one of our conversations she said something about how sometimes she didn't have a lot of money all the time.. she said sometimes she had to borrow money from her mom we laughed about it but later i went and got her a card and put $200 in it and sent it to her so there it is.. i never told anyone that i was in a relationship with a horrible girl, i started talking to a girl i knew and we had some good conversations and she sort of filled a hole for me.. she provided me with love, support, a listening ear when my horrible ex wouldn't provide me with any of these things and i didn't know what to do with myself i just felt so down but she helped uplift me so much that i just sent her $200 in a card.. unprompted.. she didn't ask for it, didn't expect it- nothing and i never told my actual girl what i did the girl from the phone was very grateful again and i don't even regret sending it because her presence meant a lot to me at the time and let me tell you something i would have LOVED to do something that cool for my actual girl at the time but she was a horrible skank who treated me like scum i would have loved to buy her some things, or hand her some money, or just do something out of the blue but i couldn't.. she was terrible to me, always arguing with everything i said, always upset, always being secretive, always just being a source of pain and stress so anyway.. those are two things i never told anyone that happened when i was with my ex recap 1. when i was with my ex i was reduced to not being able to even see her unless i essentially paid her... smh 2. i couldn't get my girl to express gratitude even when i took her out and paid for parking and bought her dinner at a nice restaurant.. but a girl i talked to on the phone expressed gratitude over a song i made for her 12 years prior.. (what a contrast, smh) so i sent the girl i talked to on the phone $200 in a card unprompted i have been thinking a lot about how much happier i am not being in that last horrendous relationship
i think about it and it just amazes me sometimes what is so amazing is that i was holding onto that relationship so strongly, but that was the very thing that was basically ruining my life how crazy is it to hold onto something that makes your life worse.. and not only that but to hold on so tightly my life even with the ups and downs i've experienced has been soooo much better without that horrendous "relationship" ...its really like a night and day type of thing sometimes i sit and i just think about how i feel like myself again and its a blessing.. when i was in that "relationship" it was like i forgot who i was or something.. i remember she hated loud aggressive rock music but i like it.. and now with her out of my life i can play it anytime i want without having to deal with some dumb thing she does as a response, or hear her complain i really just sit and think about how much better my life has been since i just let women leave.. before i was trying to keep them but they are horrible most of the time.. just letting them go has been such a great decision i wish every man could experience what it is like to let go of women.. there is so much peace and so much inner contentment.. i mean it is really like.. something you can't overstate.. all of the feelings of inadequacy you experienced in trying to get women.. THEY ARE GONE WHEN YOU LET WOMEN GO all the weird positions women put you in, you don't have to deal with them.. all the whoredom u tried to overlook, its out of your life you don't have to be faced with her past everyday.. all of her complaining, all of her blaming you for things that don't make sense, all of her confusing statements, all of her "my friends don't like you" crap.. her lack of appreciation and lack of gratitude, her inexplicably bad attitude, her constant arguments, her lack of direct communication, her attempts to make you jealous.. i mean the list goes on and on and on and on and on i just hope whoever reads this can feel my heart on this.. this is not a joke.. this is not "incel talk" like many people would try to say it is this is just my truth and i hope some guy somewhere reads this and understands he doesn't have to put up with the crap i let go of the crap and my life got way better and i've been able to do some difficult things in my life.. because i didn't have a weight on my back.. i wasn't lugging around dead weight the other day i caught a flat and i had roadside tow my car and i up to firestone.... i want u peeps to understand.. i had all the money i needed for this situation i had money for the extra mileage on the tow, and i had them just put two new ttires on my car.. i had all the money, i didn't have to get the worst tires or anything, i got the lifetime alignment thing and everything my point is this.. i haven't struggled alone the way i did when i was in that horrendous "relationship" my life alone has had ups and downs but it has been comparatively very peaceful when you consider that crap tastic relationship i tried to make work i haven't been finding myself having setbacks and borrowing money and having constant issues by the grace of God i have had everything i've needed, i haven't had to ask for anything, i really hope i am conveying what i am trying to say properly... what i am trying to say is i feel free, and i have had way more peace outside of that relationship i feel so blessed to not be dealing with all the crap i put up with when i was with my ex i don't even need anything special to be grateful to not be with her i can sit and eat a corndog and just feel good that i'm not with her anymore.. and i don't eat corndogs, but i'm just saying.. i don't need anything big to feel happy to be free of all that crap its almost like when u see someone who is out of jail.. they r just happy and grateful for small things.. and that is bascially what i'm saying.. im happy to not be dealing with what i allowed in my life that relationship was extremely painful for me i could tell u guys some things about it that i never told anyone but not right now.. maybe a little later all in all i just hated that relationship but i kept hoping it would get better and it never did and i just want to say i am so thankful to be single i would still marry but she would have to prove she is not one of these horrid modern whores anyway.. i didn't proodread this at all.. i may do it later but for now i'm out i just want yall to know the headache is not worth it my life has been way better just wait on the Lord for a relationship and when you get that- stay there its really simple if u think about it.. surrender it to the Lord and He will replace the pain and turmoil and the confusion and frustration with peace i hope yall really understand what i've tried to say here this is really how women are.. u show them love and they treat you like dirt u dang near have to slap the skin off their face for them to recognize and what's worse is.. these modern whores will treat a good man like dirt and then go chase a man who does absolutely nothing for them
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