i have been thinking a lot about how much happier i am not being in that last horrendous relationship
i think about it and it just amazes me sometimes what is so amazing is that i was holding onto that relationship so strongly, but that was the very thing that was basically ruining my life how crazy is it to hold onto something that makes your life worse.. and not only that but to hold on so tightly my life even with the ups and downs i've experienced has been soooo much better without that horrendous "relationship" ...its really like a night and day type of thing sometimes i sit and i just think about how i feel like myself again and its a blessing.. when i was in that "relationship" it was like i forgot who i was or something.. i remember she hated loud aggressive rock music but i like it.. and now with her out of my life i can play it anytime i want without having to deal with some dumb thing she does as a response, or hear her complain i really just sit and think about how much better my life has been since i just let women leave.. before i was trying to keep them but they are horrible most of the time.. just letting them go has been such a great decision i wish every man could experience what it is like to let go of women.. there is so much peace and so much inner contentment.. i mean it is really like.. something you can't overstate.. all of the feelings of inadequacy you experienced in trying to get women.. THEY ARE GONE WHEN YOU LET WOMEN GO all the weird positions women put you in, you don't have to deal with them.. all the whoredom u tried to overlook, its out of your life you don't have to be faced with her past everyday.. all of her complaining, all of her blaming you for things that don't make sense, all of her confusing statements, all of her "my friends don't like you" crap.. her lack of appreciation and lack of gratitude, her inexplicably bad attitude, her constant arguments, her lack of direct communication, her attempts to make you jealous.. i mean the list goes on and on and on and on and on i just hope whoever reads this can feel my heart on this.. this is not a joke.. this is not "incel talk" like many people would try to say it is this is just my truth and i hope some guy somewhere reads this and understands he doesn't have to put up with the crap i let go of the crap and my life got way better and i've been able to do some difficult things in my life.. because i didn't have a weight on my back.. i wasn't lugging around dead weight the other day i caught a flat and i had roadside tow my car and i up to firestone.... i want u peeps to understand.. i had all the money i needed for this situation i had money for the extra mileage on the tow, and i had them just put two new ttires on my car.. i had all the money, i didn't have to get the worst tires or anything, i got the lifetime alignment thing and everything my point is this.. i haven't struggled alone the way i did when i was in that horrendous "relationship" my life alone has had ups and downs but it has been comparatively very peaceful when you consider that crap tastic relationship i tried to make work i haven't been finding myself having setbacks and borrowing money and having constant issues by the grace of God i have had everything i've needed, i haven't had to ask for anything, i really hope i am conveying what i am trying to say properly... what i am trying to say is i feel free, and i have had way more peace outside of that relationship i feel so blessed to not be dealing with all the crap i put up with when i was with my ex i don't even need anything special to be grateful to not be with her i can sit and eat a corndog and just feel good that i'm not with her anymore.. and i don't eat corndogs, but i'm just saying.. i don't need anything big to feel happy to be free of all that crap its almost like when u see someone who is out of jail.. they r just happy and grateful for small things.. and that is bascially what i'm saying.. im happy to not be dealing with what i allowed in my life that relationship was extremely painful for me i could tell u guys some things about it that i never told anyone but not right now.. maybe a little later all in all i just hated that relationship but i kept hoping it would get better and it never did and i just want to say i am so thankful to be single i would still marry but she would have to prove she is not one of these horrid modern whores anyway.. i didn't proodread this at all.. i may do it later but for now i'm out i just want yall to know the headache is not worth it my life has been way better just wait on the Lord for a relationship and when you get that- stay there its really simple if u think about it.. surrender it to the Lord and He will replace the pain and turmoil and the confusion and frustration with peace i hope yall really understand what i've tried to say here
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enid and seymourthe transition.. and the last hurdle archives
August 2023
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