i posted this comment on a youtube video.. i thought i'd post it here as well, maybe it will help inspire someone:
there's a girl at my job who is 26 and she had a baby like a yr and a half ago.. so of course she is used to being a little smaller but i told her she looks better now with the extra weight.. she said she is going to get some fat taken out of her stomach and put into her butt.. i try to tell her she looks good already.. but she seems to not care what i say.. i also tried to say "ok u have 1 kid now so what r u going to do if u have another kid? u will be going back and forth to doctors.. just be comfortable in your skin u look good already" but i don't think women listen to men these days.. anyway.. her child's father is in prison so its one of those situations where its like........ maybe i should stop trying to talk to her because she might be what nas called a black girl lost.. they just want what they want and do what they do.. i believe her lack of self esteem comes from something deep rooted.. its not her looks.. but imo it is manifesting in her physical self image... being a black male i understand some of the things we go through may cause us to have low self esteem.. like racism coming from teachers may make us think we aren't smart or we are unable to accomplish things.. i think i had somewhat of a complex about this at one time until i got a job where i had to talk to old people over the phone to help them find senior living.. that was when i realized i was way more capable than i ever gave myself credit for.. because when u are on the phone talking to someone who can't go fishing anymore, can't hardly remember things anymore, or they can't wipe their behind anymore- it really makes u see how capable u are and how u are taking it for granted in some ways.. so i ended up going back to school and i got a masters degree during the time i worked at the senior living company... so my point is- sometimes we as black people have to take a step back, realize racist people tried to tell us we weren't smart all our lives or they tried to tell us we are criminals all our lives, or they tried to tell us we wouldn't accomplish anything all our lives.. but all of that is nothing but lies.. and we have to first acknowledge that the system tried to play us.. and then we have to make a decision to defy and/or overcome that system.. we can't just live in low self esteem and spend all our money on bigger butts or nicer clothes.. we just need to see the truth and our narrative will change that was the comment.. but i want to say some more quick things concerning the girl.. she is 26 so imo.. lipo is not the answer.. A. if she thinks weight fluctuations won't come and go in life she is likely mistaken.. i don't think its a good habit to get in to try and get work done for an extra 20 or 30 lbs.. like i said i think fluctuations here and there are kinda normal B. her booty is already big enough.. this girl looks so good its not even funny.. so when she says she wants work done its obvious she has some type of complex also.. when it comes to the racism.. to explain it more.. most teachers u come across are white females.. so a lot of times u are not given the benefit of the doubt.. not saying they are all bad, but sometimes they look down on you.. for example when i graduated and got a masters, i had to get a hood to symbolize a masters degree.. and when i went to get one, the white woman at the desk was like "are you sure you need this?" like as if to say "you're in the wrong line, you didn't earn this" they do things like this sometimes more overtly and sometimes more subtly.. but we have to just recognize it for what it all is... a lie.. we are capable and smart and don't need outside validation to achieve.. and we don't need to overcompensate for a low self esteem with looks and status when we can just shed outside notions, look inward and have true self esteem knowing we are fearfully and wonderfully made by the Lord above
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enid and seymourthe transition.. and the last hurdle archives
August 2023
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