recently i've found myself saying "i just don't care" a lot
today i think i've figured out why i feel this way about things i graduated college with a masters in 2017 i applied for thousands of jobs since then and i still work a phone job talking to karens all day i got a girlfriend in 2016 she was horrible to me the entire duration of our "relationship" and all my effort got me nowhere i was told if i moved to be closer to church that a door would open for me i moved yet nothing has happened i was friends with asia she threw me out the window what im basically saying is.. i put in a lot of effort into things in life and nothing ever materializes into anything i did like 5 albums, never got a deal or anything, nothing really came of it i've been doing this website for over a decade now.. haven't made one penny off any of it i think this is the root of my "i don't care" attitude it just feels like nothing matters it seems like throughout my life i have put a ton of effort into things but it seems like nothing has really given back to me all this really does is wear you out sometimes i feel like i get treated way worse than i should be treated i give a girl a compliment, next thing i know she is cussing me out i get an education yet can't get jobs i went to school for i'm always there for people but when i call them i'm sent to voicemail i listen to people but when i have something to say i get "oh ok" i don't know what else to do i have put so much effort into my life but it just seems like nothing has been coming together
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enid and seymourthe transition.. and the last hurdle archives
August 2023
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