i'm sitting here listening to cold's 13 ways to bleed on stage album
it feels good to get back to a place in my life where i can just sit in solitude and listen to rock music it seems like it took a lot to get back to this place.. the james zone if u will i cut a lot of people out of my life because i got tired of the constant gaslighting.. there is no power in disagreement or lies, they weaken you and your sense of reality.. a lot of the women in my life were gaslighting me a lot i feel like i had to cut them out of my life to get back to a place of peace the weird aspect of it though is- once u get to this place.. u almost wonder if u miss the people u let go of.. since i got to this apartment i have really thought about this because when i turned on my computer after it was in storage for a year i saw pictures of my ex g/f and i remembered how utterly gorgeous she was to me i truly thought she was beautiful and i would have married her if she didn't put me through so much crap.. do i miss her? not overall because it was toxic, but i guess a part of me misses what i wanted her to be, or what i hoped for, or what i believed we could've had anyway.. u guys will be happy to know i finally sat back down to look at some lyrics.. i would post some stuff but i should probably save it all for recording i do hope to start rapping again peeps wish me focus.. cuz that's what i need is focus oh and another thing.. i am trying to figure out another website or something still so if anyone has any ideas let me know.. but i hope everyone is doing well.. peaCe
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this is the birthday text my dad sent me this year
my birthday is on halloween keep in mind i stayed at my parents for like the past yr trying to get back on my feet i want u all to imagine my face when i saw this text this was right when i moved in to m new apartment.. i had an air mattress on the floor because for the first few days i was waiting on the movers to bring my stuff from storage...
as of right now i haven't been here a full month yet just want to explain one notable thing that happened to me over the past year
i am putting dashes in the jobs to keep from bringing unnecessary issues to my page so 6.29.18 was my last day at bro-kdale as i was laid off after their new female ceo came in and terminated hundreds of jobs fast forward to october 2018.. i got a job at c-gna through a temp agency...... in this job i "worked" for the bulk of that month doing nothing what i mean by this is we literally just had conversations everyday.. we were supposed to be in training but we were really just talking and goofing off 90% of the time well one day i ended up getting a higher paying job that i knew would start that november 5th, 2018 so i notified the temp agent that i was going to leave soon and she was fine with it as long as i stayed another week and a half or so well one day during this week and a half period, they told me to get on the phone.. without anyone by my side, they just said log into the phone and take calls..... keep in mind we goofed off for weeks and now here they were telling me to get on the phone.. i had never been on the phone i felt they were just throwing me out there without any real preparation so when the woman told me to get on the phone i was just like cool.. then i went to my desk, got my stuff and walked out then the temp agent called me and she was upset saying "hey u were supposed to stay until this date, what happened! i wish you hadn't done this, we wanted to be able to rehire you" so i was thinking.. wow i'll never get a job with that temp agency or c-gna again fast forward to september 2019.. i ended up doing an application for c-gna.. and in the application they actually asked if i've ever worked for them even through a third party temp agency.. i didn't lie, i checked the box "yes" (luckily it was just a yes/no question with no needed explanation) so, despite working for this company for under one month and abruptly leaving.. i still got called in for an interview, landed the job.. and ended up working at c-gna again, except this time not through a temp, instead i was hired on permanent.. and ended up making over $6 more per hour than i made working for them a year prior so i worked at a job, quit after working less than a month, and 11 months later i'm working for them again like it never happened you can't make this stuff up this partially shows u how crazy my life has been over the past year and a half or so last thing, i just want to make it clear i give all honor to God for blessing me with jobs and the ability to make money i never knew this when i was with my ex g/f... and she basically drove me insane with all her games
when he explains the dumb things modern women say, he's 100% on point and i'm glad he used the word "LIE" because that is essentially what they are doing men don't really lie to win arguments, because men are more interested in the truth at the end of the day women are not interested in the truth, they are self interested and self centered so they don't care what comes out of their mouth |
enid and seymourthe transition.. and the last hurdle archives
August 2023
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