one thing i want to put out there real quick is how in the Bible u are supposed to forgive other people but we forget one aspect of forgiveness at times
the aspect i'm talking about is forgiving yourself no matter what negative thing u've done, u should take a look back and say that was me then, but not me now everyone has done something they're not proud of, we can't continually unconsciously punish ourselves for mistakes.. we have to let it go at some point one thing i realized back when i was in counseling was i had unforgiveness toward myself over previous failures in school.. i had a big feeling like "how could i let my family down like that?" but he said what else can u do except put that behind u and try again? he said u didn't give up, u fell off, but ur back on so what can anyone say to you? when we were talking about all this it felt like tensions in my life, mind, and body were unraveling and i began to feel a lot 'lighter' he helped me come to the conclusion that i have to give myself room to breathe and i have to forgive myself for the things i feel like i failed at, or things i wish i would've done sooner, or things i messed up or botched its amazing how much unforgiveness i was harboring toward myself for miss-steps in life.. even if i did mess up, unforgiveness is still wrong regardless.. it doesn't matter if its toward someone else or urself, its still unforgiveness which is basically poison to the person who harbors it Jesus didn't die on the cross and take on my guilt for me to remain in it, He died so we could be free from such things i will point out something else about myself, when i was younger i had a bad attitude about a lot of things, i had an attitude like "ur dumb, i'm smart.. next" and i also could be very negative about things i may still have issues in my attitude but i am a much nicer person today than i used to be in general sometimes people will say things to me like "ur so nice" in various different ways and they think nothing of it but they don't understand i really appreciate that because i used to be considered a jerk or a wack person to be around and it got to where i felt a lot of guilt and wanted to change one of my old friends once said to me "james, ur the most negative person i know" fast forward years later and a different friend of mine wrote a song about me and how i always make him see the positive side of things so i feel like i turned it around for myself, i forgave myself and started to try and put the old me away and people always give me confirmation that im being a good guy now my point is that through forgiveness u give yourself room to change ok u had sex w/ someone u shouldn't have.. u feel guilty and dirty but years later do u still feel that way? if the answer is 'yes' then perhaps u should forgive yourself and change your ways feel good about your ability to turn things around and do that, u feel what i'm sayin? don't beat urself up anymore, instead let the situation make u a better person or how about "i'm fat as f*ck.. why/how did i let myself get like this?" you are still blaming yourself and there is a hint of self-pity buried in your statement.. u gotta start somewhere.. start with forgiving yourself for eating chocolate-covered pizza (lol) and begin turning it around.. hey u messed up in the past but ur doing better now, and that's that so hopefully this will help someone out it is just something i wanted to share off the top of my head
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JaimsI still got teh swag-flu. Archives
December 2011
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