the beginning Posted by poolboyjames on December 7, 2010 at 2:30 AM comments (0)when i was about 14 i decided to my first rap
i remember specifically i got a notepad and paper and it kinda seemed like a special moment because it was the first time i ever really said to myself, "i'm going to write my own rap" i got the pen and the pad and i began to write i somehow ended up writing like 2 lines about being iced-out and i realized right then that rapping takes more than i thought it would i put the pen down after those 2 lines and went and did something else all i did at the time was mental note a few things and save them for later the main things i learned in that short time period were: "i am not speaking for myself right now" "i have been conditioned through repeated mainstream rap images to rap about having money and cars and girls" "i have to find something that i want to speak about" "i don't have a voice and/or identity carved out for myself quite yet" rap always sets a higher standard for the aspiring rapper, and this was the first obstacle i faced.. u may ask.. what kept u going despite the obstacles? the answer is curiosity like when i realized i didn't have an "identity" or a "voice," then came the next thought of.. i can probably find a great deal of this THROUGH music.. and from then on i always wondered what i would sound like if i made a beat of my own, what would i sound like if i did an entire rap and played it back to myself, etc. etc. it was like a curiosity or desire to know myself in a way.. i wanted to see myself reflected to myself.. and i always felt confident in my ability to be creative.. even when i was at my worst, i always felt like, with time i could outdo any other rapper so that was my first attempt at rapping.. it was a situation where u really grow just like how they say when u plant a seed, it grows downward first.. this situation was the beginning of my grassroots.. no one could see the growth, but before action comes thought.. before execution there is knowledge.. and this experience of realizing i didn't know what i was doing was the first thing i needed to realize i only wrote those two lines and they meant nothing but i walked away with so many questions that i realized rapping isn't just something u do, i realized right then that in a lot of ways its a labor.. of love and self exploration indeed, but still a labor i understood right then that i'd have to approach everything much different whenever i picked up the pen again so after that i decided to take some time to think and mull over my approach and search for a place of sincerity.. a place where i could explore my own subject matter i grew downward that day and that was my first experience writing a rap
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JaimsHere are my 2010 blogs. I can honestly say I like looking back over these, so check them out. They're teh hotness. Archives
December 2010
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