i bought some shoes back in the fall of last yr i ended up getting tan alfani shoes from macy's i want to put these shoes on display a bit because i have really liked this pair of shoes to a point where i want to get more of the same shoes just in diff colors right now i have the tan ones, but i also want white and navy blue here are the things i love about these shoes -very comfortable -they are slip-on -you can wear them at work/church -they are nice but not overly dressy i think this particular model is called the "tanner" ..this is the model i want at least 3 pair of
great shoe.. fits really well, holds up really well.. works in many diff settings.. also not overly expensive.. you can get them in the range of like $45-$65.. the first pair i got was like $50 i think i'm only posting this for anyone who needs a good men's shoe or good gift for a man.. i really like these
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i have a lot of entries to write but i haven't really been in the mood to write them..
but i just finished watching eternal sunshine of the spotless mind for the first time its weird because this movie is like 10 yrs old or so now and i've always been a little curious about it.. i'm not a big movie person so i didn't really think about it much.. but like whenever i saw the movie at a store or something i wondered what it was about don't read any further if you haven't seen the movie yet so basically my main word for the movie is "beautiful" the cinematography reminded me of "the wackness" and the ending / lesson / wrap-up / message reminded me of "american beauty" jim carey's character reminded me of myself i saw a thing on robin williams once where someone was talking about him after he died and they said he was not comfortable one on one, he always seemed more at home when he was performing.. they said sometimes when they were alone with robin, like on an elevator or something- it was as if robin williams shut down.. as if he didn't know what to say or how to act or how to carry himself.. but when he had at least like 3 people around him, he would sort of light back up i loved hearing that because it made me feel more normal in my own skin because i feel like i'm the opposite.. but somehow i took it as a license for that to be ok.. deep down i've never really felt ok about my disposition.. the fact is, like i said.. i'm like the opposite of robin williams because if i'm around a group of people- i no longer know how to really act.. its like i shut down.. i'm a lot better one on one or maybe "one on two" but any more than that and i'm not exactly comfortable usually.. and i tend to turn down invites out with a lot of people so what i'm saying here is- that is how jim carey's character was.. he was like me in that he wasn't a social butterfly at all.. he was more awkward than me tho.. i mean he was so awkward that it was like almost ridiculous.. so i could relate but i think he was also a bit exaggerated.. which isn't bad, but i'm just saying and honestly, i think clem was exaggerated as well.. she was really outgoing to a point where.. let's put it like this- i don't think women go out of their way to talk to quiet men the way she did in the movie.. but i am not bashing the exaggeration, it wasn't bad.. i'm just pointing it out i guess part of the reason i am talking about their personalities is because the movie really reminded me of my past relationship with chrissy in that relationship i was the quiet reserved guy and she was the open, fun, social girl a lot of people probably couldn't figure out why she liked me.. because to everyone else i was just this quiet boring dude, but i think i was what she needed to feel secure.. and she was what i needed to feel some excitement and variety the movie really reminded me of us and at the end when they were in the hallway and clem was like "we get along now but we obviously won't for long" or whatever then jim carey said "ok" i almost wanted to cry lol.. i didn't cry or anything but .... the way they ended that was so well done because anyone who has lost a good relationship over some bs knows the significance of that ending.. i mean you get mad at each other and you say all these mean-spirited things when you're in the moment but when it's all said and done.. you know you loved that person and that person loved you and you wish you would've worked it out with them that whole last segment where he was playing his tape outloud was crazy because it just brought everything in perspective.. you can choose to focus in on the bad parts or you can focus in on your love and chemistry and drown out the bad parts... but we don't always have the wisdom and foresight to just appreciate and love and cherish what is in front of us that last word "ok" was just phenomenal to me.. "ok" clem has stupid hair.. but that's ok jim carey is boring.. but that's ok the list could go on you should hold on to your love and not disregard it anyway.. basically.. the movie was beautiful.. i would definitely recommend it.. for me its not something i think i would want to watch over and over... for me it seems like something you want to watch and then marinate on and discuss with other people this movie was fairly well-written and it makes me want to write a movie script of my own i actually have an idea for one.. the premise is an online dating romantic comedy except instead of it being mushy, it would be artistic... so i would do a no sex scene and no kissing policy on it.. this way the love is shown through interaction and not physical intimacy but anyway.. it would be an online dating artistic romantic comedy and what would happen is a girl would be tired of attracting men who are not genuine, so she gets an idea to post on her page that she is like 2 months pregnant even tho she isn't so she can ward off men who are unwilling to accept her in this terrible position so she finally meets a guy and they hit it off and she is always trying to keep up this facade of being pregnant... but the guy passes her test almost too well to the point where then she is worried if she tells him the truth he will be disappointed... there are a lot of other details but that's the jist of it i always come up with movie ideas out of nowhere.. for years i've come up with movie ideas, one day i'd love to write a movie i kid you not anyway eternal sunshine was great.. it wasn't perfect... but it really is one of those movies where you marinate on it for a while after it ends i feel like... what is love without wisdom? i mean every "second chance" you get at love is an opportunity to go at it from a wiser perspective it would be nice if we had wisdom the first time around... because some of us honestly don't get a second chance you can start it at 5:15 and not really miss anything yesterday the pastor at church said "most women don't want to be a wife, they just want a roommate who pays half the bills"
that is one of the truest statements about modern women imo i have seen and heard this sort of sentiment from women A LOT when they are saying they resent being a woman or they resent being expected to cook, submit, or help, or be led, or be feminine.. when they are like "why should i listen to you? we are equals" instead of just riding with their husband and letting him guide the ship i see it all the time.. girls are so excited to have someone help with the bills so they can have extra money to go back to school, or have a nicer car, or spend more money tanning or whatever but they don't want the responsibility or role of being a man's wife that's like a man wanting to be a husband and father but saying "all that provider stuff? yeah its for the birds.. but i'll still bang you and live in your house" yo when the pastor said that thing about women... i saw a girl i know in my head and how she doesn't really listen to guys and she has a licence plate thing on the front of her car that says she is independent.. (it might as well say "i'm single") and she is always talking about how she wants help with bills to go back to school.. keep in mind this is after she got two raises... i am not kidding, she got 2 raises and she is still saying that... and i thought about how guys tell her they don't like the way she acts (combative and always undermining everything they say) and she hears them but she feels like they should like it... she's like "why do men want women to agree?" lol that's like me asking "why do women want men who lead?" and being upset about it can you imagine that? me sitting around complaining like "why do women want men with a plan for their life and family? women are so dumb!" like do u see how stupid that is i guess men should want women who are contentious right? just what we men want lol when he said that it was crazy because i saw so many women and how they act and i saw all their ignorance right then and there.. i saw girls i know and their attitudes and how they think they are men and how they resent femininity how they tell their friends "why do u cook for your man? he better get takeout!" and how they laugh and sit around applauding everything you shouldn't do and/or be as a woman and i'm not saying women have to cook or clean or whatever.. to me its not about a rigid "i must do this, you must do this" way of life.. its just about being a willing and able good wife.. not laughing at how little you do for your man but instead showing him some respect and care unlike all the feminists and pseudo feminists out here not drinking coffee has been great so far i found myself eating more.. which i think is my body wanting energy.. i was getting a lot of energy from the caffeine in coffee i guess.. but now that i'm not drinking coffee i have been hungrier.. just wanting more food... they say caffeine is an appetite suppressant so it makes sense i guess.. i don't know what this means for my body exactly quite yet i also have been drinking a lot more water... when i was drinking coffee, sometimes i would force myself to drink water.. but now i just grab water and drink it naturally.. i was at work last week pouring cups of water and drinking them because that is what my body wanted.. which never really was a thing when i was drinking coffee i also started sleeping better.. in the past i could only really sleep if i went to the gym.. but now that i'm not drinking coffee my body has been going into deeper sleep and i've been having more dreams... as a general rule i believe things that makes u stop dreaming are negative because God sometimes talks to people in dreams.. i'm not saying this 100% across the board, but i definitely feel like its something to think about i have looked online to see other people who quit caffeine and one funny thing is- in the past when i looked online, all i saw were things where people said coffee is beneficial.. and now that i've quit, when i look i can find the ones where people are saying coffee is negative.. i don't really think that's a coincidence.. i imagine if the enemy sees you reaching for positive information he may try to stop you or sabotage you somehow.. so we have to be persistent in our pursuit of wisdom, knowledge, and understanding anyway... the drinking water thing is so new to me.. when u drink coffee you just don't really get thirsty.. and that dehydration leads to anger.. my worst anger was i think 2010-2013.. i would just notice something small- like someone making a noise or something and i'd want to punch them in the back of the head or something.. i mean it was bad.. i sometimes noticed it, but then again sometimes i overlooked it and it got the best of me i was just angry a lot.. impatient, short fuse, whatever u want to call it... so drinking water like a normal person is nuts to me.. like actually being thirsty is something i forgot about... actually being like "i want water" as opposed to "i crave coffee" then drinking a cup of coffee and peeing 4 times in like 2 hours and just sipping water here and there.. and never really feeling actual thirst for water if you could only understand how weird it is for me to desire and drink actual water.. i mean wow i guess i understand now why all the health people tell us we are not drinking enough water.. its not that we don't drink enough water naturally.. its that we are constantly dehydrating ourselves with caffeine one bad thing about addiction is no matter what you always have this little voice saying "you're addicted" and its always mocking you every time you notice a problem that derives from the addiction, that voice is there to mock you ok so moving on- another thing i want to point out is every day what i was doing was making dark coffee and putting creamer and caramel hershey's syrup in it.. so i was taking in a lot of sugar every day.. that was seriously a ton of sugar i was putting in my body every single day i look back and i think wow what was wrong with me? i know it was only like 2 weeks ago but still smh... i was really messed up i am glad i got off all those things i was on.. i was on a lot of things a year ago.. it was subtle tho so i didn't really realize it.. i was taking all types of vitamins and pills and drinking coffee to be awake and taking pills to force myself to sleep, and taking acetaminophen for headaches and taking ibuprofen etc etc.. i mean about a year ago things got bad and i ended up realizing what was going on i started using diff things like "this is my go button" "this is my wake up button" "this is my relax button" etc.. so one day i threw them all out.. because i feel like they mask the underlying problem.. taking a pill a lot of times is like telling your body to shutup as opposed to listening to the problem and fixing it... its like if your car started making a weird noice and instead of going to the shop you just turn your music up louder.. its not really fixing anything and its possibly making things worse so i got all those out of the picture but i still had the coffee and now that the coffee is gone i'm feeling way better not only physically, but also mentally... i'm not having the sinus problems and the plethora of other weird things i had to contend with also i'm glad to be financially free of the coffee thing.. when my addiction was at its worst i remember spending like $76 on espresso no lie.. i went to kroger and filled my cart with espresso, which would've been about 10 4packs and i went home and put them all in the fridge it was ridiculous.. the coffee addiction wasn't as expensive as the espresso addiction, but it has its own set of problems which are a little more subtle.. and in some cases worse than the espresso.. such as teeth staining, and the higher amounts of sugar anyway i know i am talking about this a lot but i just want to lay it to rest i really feel that i am free even though it hasn't been long, i prayed honest prayers here and there to be set free and then i saw an opportunity to try to quit and after those first two days i felt like i saw another opportunity to solidify my progress and on the 3rd day i threw the coffee maker out and i feel like i'm going strong so anyone who actually read all this, if you are addicted to something you can get free trust me, just pray in an honest way acknowledging your weakness and God's strength and power and you can get free.. just pray and when u feel like God gave u the power to take a step then take it... because i didn't really think i could get off coffee like 3 weeks ago i got into the band suicidal tendencies this year they have some great stuff.. i've only been peepin them since january 1st but i really like what i hear.. i saw institutionalized, and i thought that was phenomenal.. and i just kept checking them out and i like a lot of their material this song here had a brotha feelin like i wanted to stone cold stun someone at work today i wanna get some of their albums here i want to talk about the reasons for the current feminization of society
when i say "feminization of society" i mean the propping up of women over men feminists are still saying women don't have the upper hand which i disagree with because in the past men were chivalrous and feminists were apparently not happy now men are not chivalrous because women are taking on masculine roles, and feminists still aren't happy basically what i'm overall referring to is how women are celebrated in tv and media today while men are depicted as disposable and worthless also how women are in all the colleges and businesses to an extent where they outnumber men pretty much everywhere ok now that i've gotten that out of the way lets talk about why this is a current phenomenon who has a vested interest in the marginalization of men and male behavior and the celebration of the feminine? the "elite" .. the "higher ups" ..those who are telling newscasters what to say.. those who are pulling the strings in society so to speak none of this has been studied, these are just my personal assumptions reason #1. it weakens society.. women are typically A. more gullible than men (which is probably why feminism was able to start in the first place) and B. more interested in things like friends, fashion, family, etc.. whereas men are more into politics/discussion/debate etc when you look at it like this, you can see why the powers that be would rather the women have all the power in society as opposed to men a man cannot challenge any allotted authority if he has no voice (voice can mean respect, resources, status, etc) so reason one is that it overall weakens society by lowering the masculine voice and angle and giving that voice to women.. its like a war tactic, instead of trying to kill a whole army, just kill the leader men, the head of the household is now not respected or revered which (since man is also "protector") also weakens defenses across the country- both mental and physical reason #2. it destroys the family unit naturally women want men who are taller, older, stronger, wiser, and ahem MAKE MORE MONEY this is indicative of a natural dynamic in place between men and women men who are unable to get a steady footing in this matriarchal society will also be turned down by women or they will be divorced by their wives, or left by their existing girlfriends in other words, putting women over men as breadwinners and as the holders of respect/status makes it so that men no longer have that role- this then ruins families.. why? because when men have money they distribute it to their family's wellbeing whereas when women get money they only want to keep it for themselves and their children.. thus leaving the man out.. a man who is not providing is seen as an unnecessary mouth to feed this is why men should be the providers in the family unit.. because things just "work" when that is in place.. it is more functional than giving that role to the women so reason number two is it destroys the family unit which contributes to chaos and dysfunction in society.. and these things again- help the powers that be because people are then made easier to control this is the same reason they are always talking about gun control.. because they want people to be easy to control.. who is easier to control in society? the young man who had a solid family and grew up to be a doctor? or the young man who had a dysfunctional family and ended up in prison? they have a vested interest in increasing their level of control over the masses reason #3. this is one that i've really been marinating on... i over heard someone say something about this one day and ever since then it was like someone opened my eyes because if you look around you see it nearly everywhere what am i talking about you ask? MONEY reason number three is money because women on average spend more than men i never thought about this in my life, and i'm not pointing fingers at women but if you look around on a day to day basis, this does seem true.. like take me for example.. i sat in this apartment for a year with no furniture... for two months i didn't even have a mattress... are women this frugal? of course some are, but if my hunch is true that women spend more- you can bet the powers that be are aware of this also so they have a vested interest in helping women to obtain high dollar jobs so they can tax that high dollar income men in general are just more frugal than women.. this is something i honestly never thought about but its like if you just look around it becomes pretty apparent in women's cars and clothing in comparison to mens seeing as how u can't even really do something as simple as check your own email without seeing an advertisement targeted at YOU specifically- that tells me that those in power know our spending habits across diff demographics and men on average just don't spend enough for their liking so the promotion of women continues but i guess throughout history, an abundance of strong, powerful men has always posed a threat to the "higher ups" in one way or another i just remembered another thing i didn't touch on another thing feminization of society accomplishes is this.. by propping women up over men and helping women while leaving men out in the cold- they also decrease birth rates.. if men are less respected than women, if men are marginalized, if everything masculine is seen as a threat, if women are towering over men financially- what happens is birth rates will drastically decrease as women move further and further out of a man's "league" both socially and financially in the bible there is a story where a kingdom wanted to kill babies for a while because the king was afraid that the people were growing in numbers so much that if they wanted to overthrow the king- they would be able to with no problem that is the same fear we deal with here today the powers that be do not want procreation.. this is also why they are always promoting the gay agenda as well. procreation is a threat to them.. think about it the more people who are living, the harder people are to oppress the more strong men that are in society, the harder we are to control the more guns we have in society, the harder it is to come against us so their interest is to get us to feminize boys, prop up women, take away our guns, and promote abortion and give out free birth control its all one in the same in my eyes.. all the propaganda we are inundated with is for a very foul purpose my elixir/remedy is turn off the tv, stop allowing yourself to be indoctrinated, and submit to the Lord.. Christianity is a major threat to any form of oppression because If ye continue in my word, then are ye my disciples indeed; And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free. just wanted to speak on some of this.. you peeps take it easy one other thing i wanted to say about the coffee thing
every morning i go to work i notice people are basically having cigarettes for breakfast.. its like they wake up and the first thing they think about is cigarettes i don't know if any of u have noticed it but madd people smoke in the morning.. like i would say that is the time people smoke the most.. they stink up the elevators and the offices and they throw their cigarettes out of their car windows and everything but as much as i hate that, part of me feels like a hypocrite drinking coffee every morning the same way they smoke cigarettes if i wake up and drink coffee first thing in the morning the same way they do cigarettes, then i feel like i am doing a similar thing.. partaking in a morning ritual addiction so i don't want to be a part of that whole thing.. i think we should strive to be better than these "i-do-this-because-i-dread-my-responsibilities" addictions so that's one thing i wanted to say.. we should be active, willing, and powerful... not dragging, and using substances to keep us going or keep us sane.. we should have the power and strength in our character one thing that bothers me is when women try to say they want casual sex the same way men do.. they try to act like that is something women really want and desire.. women think its cool to portray that they like sex without feelings
but nearly every female's profile in online dating includes some kind of disclaimer that says something like "if you only want sex, skip me" "if you have a g/f go to the next page" "not looking for fwb" "i want something serious" "if you only want a hookup don't message me" literally like almost every female's page says something like that but then they try to say "women want sex the same way men do" ok maybe u want sex but you need to leave the "same way men do" part off that statement i doubt if guys' pages say things like "if you only want sex don't talk to me" if modern women are so liberated and love casual sex just like men then why were almost no women on ashley madison? the site was pretty much just men and bots (fake profiles) its a front.. most women don't like just banging random dudes i don't care what women do honestly, i am just tired of them trying to portray this "i'm just like a guy and i like to do what men do too" thing its just not true.. i'm not saying women don't have a sex drive.. and i'm also not saying man-whores deserve a pass i'm just saying there is a diff between reality and what some of these "modern women" want us to believe anyone feel me on this? |
I just made varsity...its good business Archives
December 2016
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