Most of us have experienced the state of emotional dysregulation at one time or another. However, women with naturally high emotionality tend to go into and come out of this state much more frequently than the rest of us. Because it is embarrassing to admit that she is out of control in this way, the high emotion woman, just like the other two women on this scale, will be very wary of discussing her challenges in this area with us.
Unsuspecting males who sit on the lower half of the spectrum of emotionality have no idea what it is like to have these very high settings. Although they are only asking her innocent questions when they want to know why she is always so angry at them, they don’t realize that they are causing her embarrassment over behavior that isn’t strictly voluntary. Most women with above average emotionality are aware that their anger, just like all of the heightened emotions they feel, is to some extent out of their control. Many of them try to save face by standing behind what they have said and done after they come out of their emotionally uninhibited state. However, if they were to be truly honest with you they would tell you that they are at those times at the mercy of emotional swings. For them, these mood changes are a normal, if slightly embarrassing, part of being female. Because high emotion states feel so normal to women, when men are confused by a woman’s anger and ask, “What do women really want,” women frequently shake their head and simply say, “You just don’t understand.”
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James Arthurnew speak, true speak Archives
December 2017
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