my old ex g/f from high school (chrissy) contacted me recently in email.. we've talked back and forth a little.. i was really happy to hear from her at first.. it kinda helped to get my mind off my more recent ex g/f questa
chrissy seems to look at me like i'm a safe space in her world i guess.. it seems she wants to see me whenever she gets back in town..
she emailed me a reply back to an email i sent her in 2013.. she was like "hey i never got this" which didn't make any sense to me.. how did you not get it if you're replying back?
just admit u never responded back then because i wasn't a priority to you
shes an ok person i guess but i can do without the deceptive stuff
i have a girl who seems to like me but i don't really think she's cute.. i really sometimes think i have some of the worst luck with women
questa was gorgeous and acted like a complete moron
this other girl is PERFECT but just does not do it for me in the looks department
believe it or not this is like actually kinda depressing to me
like i get tired of women not being a full package
i've told some people before that i feel in general, when it comes to women- us men have to choose either pretty or saved
i resent this.. i feel that i should be able to get both in a woman.. but i have yet to find that anywhere
the reason for this is because when women have good looks, they figure- hey why not just do whatever i want to do.. be a stripper, be a whore, have flings and friend with benefits relationships
they think "hey why not" ..but to a guy its like they are ruining themselves and taking themselves out of the "wife" category
the girls who aren't cute can be awful too but generally they are more likely to be more well behaved than the pretty ones
i think about my issues with women sometimes and i say to myself.. "what is the solution?"
there is no solution to this problem without God.. if He doesn't help me to get a woman then i just won't get one
one thing i've realized over time is that i hope to earn a woman of my choosing
i am not sure if this is a stupid thought or what, but deep down i have noticed i want to earn a great woman... and i want her to be a part of my blessing for accomplishment
the reason i say i'm not sure if this is stupid or not is because maybe God just wants to give me a wife.. maybe He doesn't want me to have to earn one.. so i'm not sure if i'm on the right track or on the wrong track
*thinks for a second*
i guess ultimately the whole "earn a wife of my choosing" has a lot to do with me as a man wanting to be in the driver's seat of the relationship so to speak
if i earned her and she was my choice then i am essentially operating in my gender role as pursuer and the dominant authority in the relationship whereas if a girl chooses me the dynamics might play out a little differently
the Bible says if we (humans) being evil know how to give good gifts, then how much more our Father in heaven?
He can give amazing gifts.. so i feel like i have reason to expect an amazing wife.. its just that i have to do what i need to do to get one which is to delight myself in the Lord because He will meet all our needs if we do that
i want someone pretty who will be God fearing and someone with a good attitude who won't argue with me about everything.. i want someone who will adjust to me and not try to hyphenate her last name with mine.. someone who isn't a complete idiot like most women i see in society