premise: "whatever a man sows that shall he also reap"
i feel like i am still dealing with bad karma from the main relationship i had in my life the reason for this is because people do things to me and i instantly have a flashback to when i did it in that particular relationship like i remember my main ex g/f saying "i feel like i'm in a relationship by myself" and i get it now because i try to be cool with some people and they ignore me so i'm like wow i'm reaching out over and over and they don't respond so i feel like i'm in a relationship by myself or having a love affair with a voicemail or like i sometimes will have people talk to me as they please.. i don't mind it.. i mean a few times u don't respond i understand, but at some point u gotta come around and be like "hey what's good" because i don't know how you're doing or anything.. like its not even about you being nice to me sometimes.. sometimes its just about letting me know how you're doing since i am concerned with your well being sometimes i also have situations where people are basically telling me they need a "break" from me and then i have another flashback to when i did that in the past.. i get it- they are saying they need time away from me to think and get their head clear because i represent something to them and they need to reframe- or i am just plain bugging them too much so these are the things i have to work on: i have to stop talking to people sometimes out of boredom because i am annoying the crap out of them lol which makes people feel like they need space from me and makes me feel like they are avoiding me when in reality i'm just being annoying that is honestly something i need to work on.. i have to only speak with intention and on the flip side of that- i have to be there for people when they need me.. i can't turn people on and off at will just because i do or don't feel like talking.. people deserve that as a courtesy or respect who would've thought i'd still be dealing with bad karma 10 yrs later smh
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