yesterday seemed like one of the worst days ever.. it was just some sort of inner thing.. i don't know how u'd really describe it.. do u ever have a day where u try to chill in your mind but nothing works?
u put on music u call a friend u go shopping u watch a movie u read a book whatever normally relaxes u or chills u out or calms your anxiety just doesn't work on some days and u just hear voices screaming in ur head not literal voices but like negative thoughts i'm not sure if anyone can relate to that but that's what yesterday was for me i was giving it some thought, and i came to the conclusion that the problem is probably the fact that i normally try to get away from it, or silence it, as opposed to fight it.. its like there's only so many times u can avoid thinking through alcohol or whatever it is u do to sate the pain.. at some point u have to fight or find a way to make it stop u can run but eventually it catches up to u does it not? the best thing about yesterday tho was my friend keytone sent me a song and asked me for a 16! u know.. come to think of it.. ever since i've known him, i've noticed he always seems to cheer me up when i'm having a really bad day like he used to invite me to his house before he moved to chicago.. and i'd go and all his friends would be in there smoking weed lol.. but still it was fun even tho i don't smoke or whatever we would work on music or just talk about ish but i noticed he always would hit me up when i felt low and it would cheer me back up i don't know how he does that ish on a diff note.. one thing i've been noticing a lot is that there are a lot of people who know God or who have been introduced to God or something.. but they act as if they don't know God at all i mean, don't get me wrong, u DO have people who are just completely ignorant of God, but lately all i see is people who know about God who just ignore him despite the fact that they should know better what is that about? i know it can be hard to break old habits, and staying away from sin isn't always the easiest thing to do.. but some of these people, you'd never guess they spent 15 years in church in the past, or u'd never guess their dad is a pastor or whatever the case may be to give the easiest example in the world, i could cite rappers how they accept an award on stage and thank God for it but all through their album and music video u see nothing but a celebration of immorality "'These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me." not saying i'm perfect i have my issues but sometimes people amaze me with their brazenness like take bishop eddie long for example.. recently i saw him in a picture smiling with a transvestite LOL this kind of stuff needs to stop for real.. u know.. why not take a stand? why not strive to be whole? why not strive to be one person instead of two? oh u want to be good AND bad right.. u want to be hot AND cold don't get me wrong i'm not saying be amish.. but in some instances we need to man up if we want to say we are Christian people take a stand and not just accept any old thing into our life.. put a little more thought into when u should say yes and no to things as opposed to just going on a whim all the time these^ r just a few of my random thoughts for the day.. a short journey into my brain i hope i can get this 16 done and sent back to keytone soon.. the beat is fresh oh btw i'm thinking about doing a 2011 first six months recap.. that may perhaps be the next blog
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
JaimsI still got teh swag-flu. Archives
December 2011
|