so today a girl told me i have a tendency to "shut down"
do i "shut down" or do i choose not to deal with trivial things? there's so much in life that tries to get your attention.. 80% of it is not worth your focus this is my assessment.. someone else may say "you shut down" but i just see it like.. look.. when i was younger and went to an all white school i used to have to deal with racist people from time to time i got in some fights over racism but after a while i just decided to stop fighting over it it would be a big deal over someone else's opinion of me or my race i'd beat someone up and then there would be adults involved, or even if adults weren't involved then i'd hear about how i beat someone up over and over by people around me.. but they wouldn't understand i was never proud of that ultimately i'd be thinking about how i got into a violent confrontation because someone wanted to trigger me to anger it was either fight for the honor of myself and my race and our struggle or just go on about my business and avoid people who dislike me.. let life teach them and stop taking that role upon myself because i can't singlehandedly defeat world ignorance.. Jesus was perfect and look at the world.. people are still dumb i got tired of people controlling me so i began avoiding people and ignoring them.. and today this is what i still do i was always getting into issues at school .. i remember a few kids didn't like me and they didn't even know me AT ALL.. i beat a few kids up but the racism just kept coming.. it was like something that i realized wouldn't stop and it came to where i just decided to react to it differently.. so some kid called me a nigger one day on the playground and i was with my friends and it was like either go and get into a scuffle or just keep playing basketball i decided to keep playing basketball and ever since then i am able to "shut down" or CHOOSE MY BATTLES WISELY would be a better way to put it THE END so if anyone comes at me a certain way and they are met with apathy then that's just what it is
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JaimsI still got teh swag-flu. Archives
December 2011
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