i just got malice's book "wretched, pitiful, poor, blind, and naked" for those unaware, malice is 1/2 of the rap group clipse who had some big hits i'm a big fan of autobiographies.. especially of people in the music industry.. i've read a bunch of them.. i'll let u all know how the book is when i get a chance.. i just got it today.. here is a video excerpt sample from the book in this book (from what i understand) he talks about getting success in the rap game then he talks about some things in his life that caused him to start to take his relationship with God a lot more seriously
like i said, i'll let u all know what its like soon peaCe
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i haven't had new posts for 2 or 3 days.. been a bit preoccupied.. i'll be back on here saying something soon hopefully
til then u all kno where to find me email - [email protected] aim - stylebyfire playstation id - videoshirt phone - 615-977-0329 peaCe + Luvs so i'm watchin judge judy and this woman is suing her ex boyfriend for money
ok i'm not going to get into the specifics of the case but i want to point out that this woman was bitter about him leaving her she had 2 kids, he had no kids, and she relocated herself and her kids to get a place with him he ended up leaving her u could tell from her speech she felt like it was his responsibility to be there "well your honor.. when he abandoned me" here's my issue with this YOU WERE NOT MARRIED TO HIM YOU RELOCATED YOUR SELF AND YOUR KIDS TO LIVE WITH A GUY YOU MET FROM THE INTERNET where is his responsibility? where is his allegiance? where is his commitment? from a guy's perspective she was ASKING TO GET PLAYED yeah he may make u think he wants to marry you or make you think it'll be a permanent relationship or make you think this or that.. but where is his sacrifice? what has he shown you? where has he been inconvenienced? like come on, why do women think men are going to commit without commitment seriously if he's not willing to marry you now then what makes u think moving in with him will make him want to marry you? at that point WHAT DOES HE GAIN!? and i'm not saying it NEVER happens, but for the most part, if you move in with a dude and he's getting all the benefits of a wife then there's no reason for him to marry you at that point.. as a matter of fact he will probably lose respect for you MEN WANT A WOMAN THEY CAN RESPECT, no guy wants to marry a jump-off.. he may play with a jump-off but he doesn't want to marry her.. THIS IS NOT ROCKET SCIENCE what irks me is like.. how can u possibly be that dumb? how could he have ABANDONED you when there was never a commitment in the first place? those aren't even his kids.. did he abandon you or did u play yourself? i mean dang women talk about having "women's intuition" how about women's INTELLIGENCE how about that!? HOW STUPID CAN YOU BE!!!!!! i've been making some progress, its been goin slow but progress is happening
also i came up with an album cover idea it coincides with something that happened to me last year.. whenever i do the album cover i'll make sure to explain it i'm also pretty sure i've concluded on what the name of the album will be i'm pretty sure this album will explain what its like to be me in the sense of like "james thinks about stuff like this all day" a lot of rappers rap about smoking weed and having sex and partying.. my content is going to be way different and people are probably either going to think i'm crazy or think i'm a genius because its not going to be like anything else for example, its not going to be gospel but its also not going to be secular.. its not going to be fun but its also not going to be depressing i'll keep u all posted i am going to have to find a new church to go to
the one i've been going to was (imo) SUPER WACK tonight i don't like traditional religious church.. i just don't.. i never have.. i like a church that is Bible oriented not TRADITION oriented this imo is a big problem with churches today.. u go and its boring because the people who are the head of the church are fulfilling traditions as opposed to just teaching something real and applicable there is an unsettling undercurrent at a lot of churches.. "we are going to play the wackest music of all time but if you don't sing along and raise your hands and look like ur into it then something bad will happen to you" a lot of church is for show in my opinion STOP TRYING TO FORCE PEOPLE INTO THINGS WITH MANIPULATION AND PEER PRESSURE IN CHURCH JUST SAY THE MESSAGE AND GO ON ABOUT YOUR BUSINESS i get tired of the awkward silences that are explained as "someone is getting a 'touch' from God" i get tired of the person with the mic never having a message prepared and and they say "i'm going to let the spirit move the message" .... PEOPLE NEED WISDOM NOT YOUR FREESTYLED SERMON VOID OF ANY SIGNIFICANT CONTENT!!!!! i get tired of them pressuring people into actions "come up to the altar and this or that will happen" when in reality God is likely going to deal with each person individually and in different ways at different times blah blah blah <--that's what all this traditional stuff sounds like to me... like it all sounds good on the surface but it has no real power or substance behind it to me lot of church is madd weird and madd fake.. i feel like God changes people who are willing to follow Him and He will change them in His own way, from the inside out and everyone has a different relationship with Christ but the traditional church says: you ain't singin loud you ain't saved you're not doin backflips you're not saved you didn't do altar call and the preacher preached about it for 30 minutes so you must be a sinner STOP WITH THE POLITICS PREACH THE WORD, STOP WITH THE GIMMICKS im totally not going back to the church i've been going to YUCK!!!!!!!!!! so much of church to me is an outward expression when the Bible clearly says MEN LOOK ON THE OUTSIDE WHILE GOD EXAMINES THE HEART STOP TRYING TO IMPRESS PEOPLE AROUND YOU WITH "HOLINESS" NO ONE CARES.. I MEAN WHAT, DO YOU WANT ME TO COVET YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH CHRIST!? HOW NONSENSICAL WOULD THAT BE!? DONT SHOW ME, SHOW GOD!!!!! my frustration is at level BONKERS right now THIS IS WHY PEOPLE SAY CHRISTIANS ARE SO FAKE.. BECAUSE SO MANY CHURCHES PUT SO MUCH VALUE ON OUTWARD EXPRESSIONS OF 'HOLINESS' IT IS WORTH NOTHING TO GOD.. WHAT DOES THE BIBLE SAY? PRAY ALONE IN YOUR CLOSET SO THAT WHAT YOU DO IN SECRET MAY BE REWARDED OPENLY WHEN YOU FAST, DONT MAKE IT KNOWN TO MEN HOW YOU SUFFER, WASH YOUR FACE AND LOOK ALIVE BE CAREFUL NOT TO PRACTICE GENEROSITY IN THE PRESENCE OF OTHERS TO BE SEEN BY THEM, IF YOU DO, YOU WILL HAVE NO REWARD FROM YOUR FATHER IN HEAVEN a lot of things in your walk with Christ will be private (not everything, but a lot of it) so stop with the garbage.. at the end of the day, just because ur doin backflips in church DOES NOT MEAN that u didn't fornicate the night before stop praising outward stuff.. stop pressuring people into outward stuff.. if i ever start a church it will be real, everyone will feel comfortable and the word of God will be number 1... NOT TRADITIONS AND FAKE PEOPLE WHO WANT TO LOOK HOLY IN FRONT OF OTHERS u know what
i think the absolute worst cancellation of entertainment/media/expression is when someone stops doing blog entries in my life, i've followed 5 or 6 different personal blogs and all of them are gone now this has left me feeling more empty than i would've expected you go to a person's website or blog and they constantly talk about what's important to them.. they show u what they're doing, what they're thinking about.. what they dislike and what they appreciate it goes on and on constantly for a year, maybe two years, maybe even three.. you really begin enjoying seeing what this person is up to even if you're not interested in what they're talking about at that particular moment.. you get used to taking a minute out of your life to see what is going on in someone else's then for some reason a week will go by and they haven't posted anything, or perhaps a month.. or perhaps one day u will go to their page and it says something like "this account no longer exists" and you literally feel like you've lost a friend or something really important to you has been ripped away maybe this is how people feel when they lose a pet.. a dog can't talk but you get attached to that dog.. a person's blog is just a lot of random thoughts on the internet but you get attached to it it is one of my biggest pet-peeves when a person has a decent blog and they stop updating it.. it is wildly annoying and almost even painful to me its almost like a panic type reaction.. "where are they?" "what are they doing?" "why aren't they posting anymore?" i find it to be a bit selfish to be honest.. yeah u may want to take your website down but what about the people who have grown attached to it? some people may have grown accustomed to seeing your thoughts, views, and opinions.. your quirks and awkward habits.. your flaws and your triumphs and you just take your website down and you don't even give a reason why real talk i find it to be annoying and its my goal to keep my site up here for everyone for as long as i can so people can come through and perhaps see a bit of their self in me, or maybe just be like "dang pool boy is bonkers" and peep what i'm up to sidenote example: when i go on dates i tell my roommates how it went.. and it got to where they'd come up to me out of nowhere and be like "u been on any dates lately?" or "how are things with the ladies?" or whatever one time i had a really bad date and said i didn't want to talk about it and they were all like dang i wonder what happened? and they REALLY wanted to know at that point i eventually told them what happened when i was less pissed off about it.. but what if i was just like "you know what? i'm not tellin u guys about my dates anymore" that would be wack as fck and its the same type of deal with a personal blog.. u tell ur story to a point where people want to know what happens next.. ..so its annoying for a person to just up and delete their whole site cuz the reader is left sitting there like WTF soooo i hope this website stays up for a long time and means something to someone.. i don't want to be like those people who do a big website or blog and just up and quit one day and i understand sometimes u want to just not be bothered by your website or whatever... sometimes u don't feel like saying anything.. if ur in one of those moods do like me and announce a break or vacation.. i have enough respect for the readers to say "i'm taking a 2 week break" as opposed to just disappearing i don't get paid for this ish, i do it for myself and for anyone who may be following.. this is about having something to look at when u get online.. its about community, its about discussions, and self expression to be honest with u guys, i really don't know any other personal blog that is updated as consistently as mine so i hope this means something to someone.. and i'm gnna try to be here for as long as possible whether people come through and read it or not.. i'm really trying to hold this personal blog thing together and do it with integrity so while all ur other favorite personal blogs end up getting deleted or updated only 5 times a year.. i hope to be here posting ish like i have nothing better to do i'm trying to play for keeps with this thing so lets go when i first saw this i thought it was photoshopped but its a real pic this is actually what he wore (or was told to wear) to this photoshoot
http://www.interviewmagazine.com/music/lil-wayne/ his jacket and pants probably have more crazy stuff written on them but i can't zoom enough to read it all i hope i don't have to explain the imagery to you.. if you don't know anything about what i'm talking about then go to vigilantcitizen.com this clothing line is totally satanic.. www.unifclothing.com ..people think this is a game.. this clothing line is probably funded by the illuminati and people think illuminati is a fictional organization.. ok keep thinking that, u've basically already lost poolboy = WINNING! btw.. i hope my new album will basically be the OPPOSITE of what u'd get from a lil wayne album as i work on the new album i keep narrowing down ideas
here are two things that just popped in my head 1. my goal is to use all my own beats.. i came to this conclusion today when i was listening to some beats.. i realized listening to other peoples' beats is like the whole "open-book-test" syndrome you look and look and look and by the time u find what u want, then the time's up also i've been thinking i have to create a picture of what i have to offer.. i think this would be best achieved if i made every beat 2. i want the subject matter to be more serious and more for the listener this time around i want to let the listener view their own life as opposed to viewing mine i am going to try and say what i want to say as opposed to what people expect.. my opinions on things are very different from the norm so i want to take advantage of that so far i've done a beat and a chorus and i've come up with a concept.. hopefully the verses will be done soon and we can move on to the next song one thing that kinda pisses me off is when i see a young couple who doesn't get married because of what their families might think, or because they think they don't have enough money, or because they think they're not old enough or whatever
i don't agree with the stuff most people say to young couples.. they say things like "you don't know what love is" or "you can't get married right now ur just a baby" look, if they want to get married fck it let them do it.. what do you expect people to do? you tell people to not fornicate then u advise them not to get married like wtf sometimes i think about the girl i had when i was 20 and i think about how special our relationship was.. i walk around now and no one understands me or gets me for who i am.. she did tho sometimes i really regret how our relationship fell through.. i go through life and no one gets my jokes, no one even WANTS to get to know me or anything.. i've taken girls on dates and just sat and watched them act like idiots.. my old g/f really understood JAMES you know what i'm sayin? i could make the dumbest joke ever and she would laugh or make fun of me in a loving way.. i hate that people tell you that because ur young, u shouldn't appreciate that kind of stuff its backwards.. i really don't agree with anything in society and some days it really pisses me off right now i know a couple and they're both 20yrs old.. they've been together for a few yrs and one of them told me "i can't wait to get married and get on with my life" i didn't say anything but to me i'm like man DO IT like seriously what the fck are you waiting for? you're old enough, you love who ur with, they understand u, they don't have baggage, they're in tune with you, you can get an apartment or house together and save money, you can still do school, you don't have to have kids until u feel like it.. like WHAT THE FCK IS THE BIG HOLD UP WHAT R U WAITING FOR? i think about my own life and i think i would have been in better shape had i stayed with my ex and if our relationship hadn't gotten screwed up we'd be doing really well today we had our issues but in my mind if we would have manned up and went to counseling we would've been cool.. and there are a lot of resources for that.. relationship counseling, marriage counseling.. these things are common and not to be frowned upon a lot of times we give up on relationships when they just need something small.. like throwing away a car when all it needs is an oil change... ngga take your ish to valvoline and have them get u back on the road here are my thoughts on family: their opinion isn't worth anything.. if they just don't like someone because of some petty reason then distance urself from ur family.. if they have REAL concerns.. then hear ur family out and take the right steps here is an example of petty ish: "i don't like ur boyfriend because he's black" here is an example of a real concern: "ur girlfriend has 2 kids by two different men and you have a good job and no kids.. are you sure she's in this for the right reasons?" now.. here's my view on the money issue.. F*CK MONEY don't make money your God.. be wise with it but when you need to use it to your advantage then you just have to do that.. like for example.. how many of us would be in college if we didn't have loans? we have to take out the loans in order to make progress.. i know it sucks balls but sometimes it might be necessary to spend a little something in order to just jump a certain hurdle if you spend a lot then pray to God that He will help you to pay your debts back and work to free yourself of the debts at the same time tho.. be responsible.. do u need a huge wedding? if your love is really that strong why not just go to the courthouse and make a deal with ur spouse.. "look, we'll get married right now, but in 5 yrs when we're financially stable we'll have a big wedding" now ur married and u have 5 yrs to plan a perfect wedding.. what the fck is wrong with that? why do people think they need to just sit around single for 10 yrs saving up for a wedding? by the time they get the money issue together then the relationship is probably over because there was no true commitment for such a long time i'm so tired of gay nggas talking about how bad they want to be married and straight people avoid it for every reason under the sun.. look, that ish is RIDICULOUS.. its totally morally effed up and backwards.. gay nggas want to do the wrong thing the "right" way and straight people want to do the right thing the wrong way.. .. LETS DO THE RIGHT THING THE RIGHT WAY!!!!!! lets get it together, if God gives you someone, appreciate them and put them in the position they should be in of your wife or husband.. stop with the bs rhetoric and this blog could kinda go for people who want to have kids too.. if you want to have kids then do it.. don't let people tell u kids suck all the life out of you or this or that.. look if thats what u want then go ahead.. children are a blessing.. don't let people tell u they are a burden with no benefits overall stop letting society and miserable people tell u what u can/can't should/shouldn't do if you're living right then DO WHAT YOU WANT if you're in sin then that's a whole diff thing, i'd never say its ok for someone to sin cuz i don't want to see anyone end up in hell, but if what ur doing is right don't let people talk u out of that ish |
JaimsI still got teh swag-flu. Archives
December 2011
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